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Back in Heaven

by Skyler Skjelset

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1.
Cobalt 04:28
Life to me seems a joke, this truth can’t be real. yet, so sure and ungracefully, i’d held your hand for a while strange how it felt so real - i swear i was there. flowers on the breeze, i felt the sun beat on my neck to have had and to have lost - the same two sides of a love’s great cost. but like i’ve read, to chase such things may grace us with a snowfall in spring. a shimmer in the light, the gleam in your eyes so cool and easy u walked by with ur hair let down cobalt is the sky, venus at dawn, this dream slipped from my hands in a picture from the past it’s hard enough to wake each day but it was love and it will still find a way the chance is rare, when it hits you hard your heart is soft it will leave it’s scar if it hurts, is it worth the pain? loss & love are just one the same and like i’ve read, to chase such things may grace us with a snowfall in spring
2.
Sevens 04:44
I’ll sit in my black sphere of oil and glass. i’ll think of all that i have known - all i’ve known that has now come to pass the world could be brilliant… draped in gold. i’m sick of all this bitterness, all of your self-imposed self-neglect but i have seen it all in a half-light! & I have have seen it all in a half-sight! open up ur heart to let somebody in. it’s hard enough just to take the chance and i’d be here for you. i would, if you want me to. you’d have no cause for alarm. you gave me a flower. i have it still. i slid it in my pocket then - a reminder of a life that could have been. i hold it so dearly: close to me. a symbol of some other time, a life that i’m not so sure i’d call mine but i have seen it all in a half-light. & i have seen it all in a half-sight though weird how her body glowed, this girl called crystal claire - she lived her life with the fear of loss and times flows just one way this ink will surely fade with each night comes a new day i know the pain is hard but love is so uNreal two things linked inseparable in the ebb & flow of time life is etched in sense memories come back one by one
3.
All Roses 04:55
When you closed my eyes, I saw nothing else - A moment of a ~ dream ~ :: the place I wish to be :: & what was left behind, Shimmered Bright And Gold. But I do not care… I have 2 tell myself. (Heavy Sigh) Grown out of blue Red in it’s hue the Fire that kept Me drawn 2 You! Lost in its warmth, I felt alive - “A moment of peace deep inside my mind.” All things must pass, like all things do. it was nice, but I guess it’s not forever. So I wake each day and I try to find how to live a lie without that false dream I remind myself of the life I live: The thing’s I’ve found for me - nothing 2 do with You. … Thoughts of you still Spill into view; They’ll never leave me and I hope not from You moving on life can be new. Now take what you’ve learned and you’ll see it through. even afterward, love still lingers on, i know it’s true. i have you here. You’re still with me. but it can’t change my beautiful place - we always were and we always will be inexplicit.
4.
The Angel 05:57
To ~end up~ blind, alone with you ~there~ kills me. I felt the decay wither at my crown. At the ~end~ I ~begin again~. Perplexity ensued when we ~came across~ that ~dead~ dog. You asked me what I’d feel if you were ~gone… ~ How could you know that you’d ~own~ my heart? This mark of three: ~ the eternity ~ ~Waiting~ under those falls where we said I’d meet you; strong and ~ sure~ his ideal of himself. Bathed in white, prepared self-impressed; Graceful strength, ~love won’t acquiesce~. I’m ~here. ~ I’m ~ with ~ you. I will ~always be right there.~ I ~ move through ~ the bodies of some beauty and a love. (singing) Your mind convinced, you ~ think you know ~ who you are. A golden listlessness surrounds your ~life ~ . ~ Believe~ the lie that you’ve told yourself! ~Be~ a vase to ~ withhold ~my soul. I’ll ~ wait ~ just out ~ here, ~ in a sea the black depth Fertile, this mare! In a ~ death ~ there is life! horses ~ run swiftly ~ ; ~ always ~ for some hidden thing. I’m ~ here. ~ I’m ~with~ you. I will ~always be right there. ~
5.
HK Iris 06:30
Thoughts of you and where you’re from I dreamed of you and where you’ve gone A dragon slips by on the skyline An Iris alone in the sun The fire in the sky burns brightly Hell and heaven amalgam  Life lit up all neon like I’ve seen this place a million times It waits for me there in the distance The one place I have left to go I’ll meet you at the California, I’ll have a new note Please be real This place I have found Too good to be (this) true I won’t make a sound 瞓醒至瞓覺,我都係諗住呢件事。 果陣時我見到一個黑色地方,其實係咪真㗎? I close my eyes and hope I’m back I see the view - it’s ”perfect black” I’m sitting out there with you fighting I loved you still & forever I still taste the air as it rolls in Please take me back there I wake up,  Drenched in a sweat,  How did I get back here? I am my own mirror The place we found Our holy ground Then we said a hey lah  New colors & sounds 幾年之後,我繼續諗住嗰果城市。 我諗番我哋去左嗰D地方,坐船去海邊,夜晚行街,我哋一齊嘅話-定有少少魔術啦。 可能我哋就吾可以番去,不過我哋可以係心裡珍惜,好似我哋好耐之前聽咗首歌,只係俾我同你聽嘅。
6.
Sunflower 04:22
6. “Sunflower” (charmaine) The rose it grows, it’s thorns around my neck, my voice is held back, the colors fade black, breathlessly, (charmaine) but now i hold, hope for us still, this beautiful thing, the songs that we sing, in harmony, So I reach into black to hope that someday i will hold the Lavender Hand of Fate (charmaine) through it all, i know it’s out there, the place of my own, where the sunflowers grown, peacefully, (charmaine) So I Reach Into Black to hope that Someday I will hold The Lavender Hand of Fate (charmaine)
7.
Sayoko 03:20
THOUGHTS OF YOU AND THE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU LINGER ON - THEY’RE LIKE GLUE, ADHESIVE YOU’VE GOT AN AIRE, A HYPNOTIC SHAPE GIVE IT TO ME, LET ME HOLD IT   STUCK IN A DREAM BUT IT FEELS SO REAL -  IS THIS LIFE? TAKE ME WITH YOU LOOKING PAST YOUR SHIELD, THROUGH THE A.T. FIELD EMBOSSED IN A BLACK, YOU ARE MY GREATEST I’D SWIM THE DIRAC SEA, JUST TO GET TO YOU I’LL LOVE YOU THE MOST  “10,000 YEARS” THOUGHTS OF YOU AND THE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU THEY’VE HELD ON - FOREVER, IMMUABLE STUCK IN A DREAM BUT IT FEELS SO REAL - IS THIS LIFE? TAKE ME WITH YOU
8.
V C 07:16
~ The moment I close my eyes I see a vision made of you. Cool in it’s small movements, it is grateful through and through. It’s like I’ve swimming great depth and your beauty is the lake: Prismatic with its spectrum, it’s way too hard to convey. ~ When this all happen or am I still asleep? A dream’s been made real for me - I hope it’s something I can keep. It’s like I’ve found something I wasn’t really supposed to see: Something so unreal, yet it rests in front of me. The perfect shade of a Perfect Black, Drips like ink out from a pen; against the dark hang Seven Stars. • Lost - I can’t tell if it’s real. I’ve tried so hard to feel; separated from myself I cannot deal. The loop: the chain of gold that you hold is wrapped around me whole; keeps me able, feeling like I’m in control. ~ This rarity is wonder, yet it’s happened nonetheless. A gift in its own being, will forever still impress. It’ s like a knife cuts through it and my heartbeat gets too quick. Roses color flushes through me from your silver fingertips. The perfect shade of a Perfect Black Drips like ink out from a pen; against the dark hang Seven Stars. • RARE - the sight of something like this; Like a RED RAINBOW IN THE MIST. How on earth could they be in my midst? PRETTY, your hair tied back with a bow; complicated through the grow of the sunlit strands of your hair’s silken flow. GONE - my sight’s blurry and grey. Without you here I will stray. In disassociation: my life’s disarray. HELD in the palm of your hand, maybe then I can understand and finally find the strength to help withstand. ~
9.
Yamaha 05:18
9. “Yamaha” I’d been trying so long To find that feeling now gone & what I found was so bright it still keeps me up at night Chance can happen so fast A life in two: a contrast The pearl melted in my palm  It was “Made in Heaven” all along All I want to do is look back fondly now,  I remind myself without it I was d e a d I always close my eyes and dream that I’m back there; Half alive, still breathing sweetened air Soft & warm it was kind But some things just don’t al ign I still can’t believe what I saw 天国から、君は。 How am I supposed to live through all this now? The avoidance, the fear; denial of the self Living a life like that is such a fucking joke To count imaginary numbeers all day long Possibilities both endless and infinite I took a chance to see if it would fit To meet the messenger from the ends of the earth; I remember you sick and dancing there.

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released August 28, 2020

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Skyler Skjelset New York, New York

Living musician from New York.

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